Can Honesty Really be Imposed with Rules?

One of the most incredibly famous proverbs works around a trait that has been abused almost beyond human attribution. “Honesty is the best policy” – ooh yeah? How about practicing it mate? :-D A cruel analysis of events reflects that worldly honesty comes with a condition that most aren’t willing to discuss – “to be practiced only within the confines of convenience”. There have also been calls for strict rules in the systems of governance to ensure that honesty is practiced. The most recent case is being seen in India where a call for Jan Lokpal is being made quite strongly. Though a strong way to curb corruption and ensure honesty is the desperate need of the hour, the following points prevent me from being too optimistic.

Can the King Ensure that his Sons will be Good Too?

Even if we assume that the current crop of leaders is dedicated to fight against corruption (lack of honesty), can it be guaranteed that the board members, who will follow them, will be of the same disposition? This question is essential, considering they will possess immense powers if the Bill is passed. History is abundant with cases where good kings, even though they are essentially monarchs, have played pivotal roles in some of the most developed and progressed civilizations. When there is great power laid in the hands of one good meaning person, the journey to progress is undoubtedly fast. The problems start once such power reaches the wrong hands. Even if the shifting of power does not happen inside the family (like a monarchy), it is a dangerous proposal to put so much power in the hands of a few. Democracy works on the decentralization of power and its institutions work as checks against each others’ dictatorial ambitions.

Can there be Honesty without Tolerance?

The raging discussions on honesty notwithstanding, it is not something that can be forced with laws. Honesty is a way of life which can be practiced only in an environment of tolerance. For example, how can I be honest about how that dress looks on you if you are intolerant of any negative views? Society, in an attempt to diffuse the harshness of nature, has devised numerous ways to temper down the tone of presentation through ways of diplomacy. Though this does become necessary on occasions, this fosters the habit of a search for comfort zones, where the honest views are carefully pushed out of the light.

You May Not Take but Can You Resist Offering?

In the context of bribes, the best way to curb dishonesty is to stop paying under the table. How can anyone accept a bribe if none agrees to pay it? But will you be able to practice the same, when something valuable to you is at stake. For example, even if the school where your child wants admission (but is not able to do so, on merit) does not ask for donations, will you be able to resist offering any?

Will you be Honest in the Face of Loss?

The strength to stay honest diminishes even further in the face of loss. You may be able to resist the temptation of dishonest ways in order to achieve a premier position, but how about the occasions when you face a loss. If your child commits a crime right before you, how many of you will have the nerve to take him to the police station and report it?

Society’s tendency to create comfort zones has strewn thorns on the path of the honest. The ones that have to face the music, due to your honesty, are not tolerant of your actions. Even if you are the only one hurt due to your honesty, you will be strategically labeled a complete idiot. The path of honesty in the modern age is for the bravest of hearts that can take the scorn of even their own. The rest are just calf rhinos waiting to transform.

To Judge or Not to Judge is Not the Question

Somewhere, sometime, you must have heard the spectacular judgment delivered on the requirement of “not judging”. Yes, that is what it is in itself – A judgment. Remember the number of times you have nodded in acknowledgement whenever someone in the circle delved on the need to “not judge people”. They were almost reflex-nods without even realizing that the judgment to not judge is also a judgment. But, more importantly, is it even possible to stay un-judgmental?

Take any instance when you meet a person for the first time in your life. Within the first few minutes of interaction, you have already made tens of judgments depending on how the person talks, dresses, walks, breathes, etc. Another example which illustrates our inability to “not judge” works on the way a person speaks to us. Let us take a statement like “Will you pass the salt please”. Most will agree that this is a common statement heard at a dining table. Now, suppose you are dining with a person for the first time and he utters this line to you. Let us imagine that the person shouts out this line threateningly. What is your reaction then? You either cower down in fright or you look at him threateningly, with a clear intention of breaking his jaw. Why so? Well, that’s because you have made a judgment on the person and are reacting to it. You did that automatically, without any prompting. If this is considered in the context of the above directive of staying un-judgmental, it paints a scary picture! How can you control something you are doing involuntarily? Should we then consider it a hopeless human situation and submit to the nasty circumstances that judging a person brings along with it?

Well, the idea becomes simpler when you realize that the mistake that you are making is not in judging the person. The mistake is reacting on the basis of a judgment too soon. If we go back to the dining table discussed above and imagine that the same statement, “Will you pass the salt please”, is uttered in a polite tone, the way we will judge the person will be diametrically different. As far as the tone of the statement is concerned, it may be dependent on a number of reasons. The person may be upset about something. He may not have been his usual self when he shouted. Then, our cowering down or threatening looks may not have been an appropriate reaction. But, as mentioned earlier, the judgment will be passed instantaneously and involuntarily. Hope comes with the realization that the judgment is not the real problem. The real problem would occur if you proceed with your actions based upon this judgment and stay away from the person forever, or lean over the table and actually land a punch on his jaw! If you allow some time on every judgment before acting on it, the ensuing situations would be much better.

Thus, the real question is not whether you should judge or not – if you are honest with yourself, you know that you WILL judge! The question is whether you allowed enough time before acting on your judgment or did you jump into conclusions?  Now, though most judgments prove to be wrong with time, some of them are spot on at first strike (which should be made sure of by giving them time). You may then need to cower down or throw that punc..err sorry.. threatening look anyways! What would you do?